The Case for Self-Acceptance

So much of my work focuses on helping people accept basic truths about themselves that they may or may not already know but struggle to fully internalize. In order to translate self-awareness to self-confidence, there is a middle man of self-acceptance. This is often the hardest step, but it is a crucial piece of the puzzle.

Self-awareness is being conscious of the thoughts, feelings, and personality traits that make up one's being. It is my belief that levels of self-awareness exist on a continuum and vary greatly from person to person. Some people are naturally very aware of what makes them happy and what makes them tick while others sometimes struggle to see their own desires and motivations clearly and are eager for others to point things out for them.

But even the most self-aware clients still come to me and say things like, "I don't know why I don't have more confidence. I just want to be more ____." As a therapist, I certainly embrace the importance of self-growth and setting goals for ourselves, but I also fully embrace self-love and acceptance of those things that make us each the unique individuals we are.

Acceptance is a part of mindfulness, being aware of our thoughts and feelings without passing judgment on them. This is true of our personalities too. In many cases, being aware of who we are and accepting that without judgment or wishing it were different can be so liberating and certainly lead to more happiness than spending our time wishing we were different.

This week, I encourage each of you to think about what it is that makes you unique, whether it is something that is currently perceived as a strength or a weakness, and work toward accepting all of who YOU are. Accept the "good" with the "bad." At the end of the day, the goal is to realize that there is no "good" or "bad." Accepting who we are without passing judgment on ourselves will lead to healthy self-acceptance, clearer goals, and more realistic expectations of our wants and needs in this life.